Movin’ Too Fast (Lost in Plainview)
Melissa is driving across the desert into California when she decides to stop and pick up Nina the backpacking girl so she will have company during the long drive. Melissa is a shy young woman with an accent that sounds distinctly European and a strange tendency for vomiting with no explanation. Nina is hot, spread her legs around and loves to video tape everything because Amercian beeauty is her-an obsession. If you thought the female banter in Death Proof was bad, do strap yourself in for the one these two ladies have.
A quick break at a nowhere diner which takes a turn to become not about having something to eat, but rather about getting to know a hot enforcement official through a passionate match of frisbee in the parking lot. That same cop in a blacked-out police vessel that suddenly attracts them and precedes a wash of broad smiles shall definitely pull them over. A four dollar ticket is issued for “wasting gas” which allows them to accompany him to the precinct where Nina and the deputy manage to sneak a make out session inside one of the lockers.
Well, that was the plan until the other cop on duty decided that it would be fun for Melissa to meet his pet tarantula. Melissa screams; Nina thinks it’s time to postpone because her date is panicking. This does not sit well with the cop who is all over her and he tries to rape her.
After a knee to the nuts, the two girls are now on the run. They are about to become the hunted, with only a black police cruiser in charge of their pursuit. And it is very likely that this cruiser is being driven by the deputy who had an altercation with Nina in the jail cell.
The rest of the tape has the two women in the wind through the desert wastelands in sets to a black police cruiser which seems to have an on and off relationship with the movie. Such other desert nomads will be met along the way but their appearances are to boost the kill count. Some mysteries will be unveiled. Women will develop friendships. Rednecks get what they deserve. Shots will be made. Cars will be totaled. Boredom will endure.
Perhaps ‘movin’ too fast’ is the phrase which the film Movin’ Too Fast does not warrant even once for its usage. Split into different parts, this thriller has a lot of the attributes of an exploitation movie but one that has style and direction afforded it by the Sundance Film Festival style approach the writer/director Eric Chambers explains in the making of the film that he wanted to create something more engaging and conventional than the often synthetic horror-thrillers of this genre. In addition to a shotgun death that might very well have been cinematically the most horrific death possible, the only thing stormy about the film would be the sand of the desert.
And engaged? Do you mean like the faceless freak in the turbo police car who is just driving around for fun why does he even want to chase these two women? Or do you mean how two ‘Wanted’ women can run around in the desert of Southern California for several days and remain stuck in one of its several unremarkable corners?
Though I believe Chambers was on the right track as he wanted to direct something respectable and much deeper than typical ordnance of sex violence strip sounds and naked fights, it must be conceded that he was awarded failure in all the wrong ways.
This is easily my favorite scene in the whole of haywire, helped along the way by his bad judgment of committing two of its grievous (and badly clichéd) sins at once, setting the poor tone by introducing both of these elements in the opening sequence of the film.
It begins when the leading actress sprinkles her timescreen with callous verse to depict her philosophical outlook of human nature which she knows is deep, but the viewer is stressed to hear her vanity. To make matters worse, the actress herself appears to be extremely bored reading these words and we have no choice but to project her attitude.
Unfortunately, in the cliche pretentiousness sweepstakes, there was an overuse of near-religious symbolism. No one can figure out how to turn the controls of the radio in these desert regions. It looks like the only available channel should feature a preacher who screams about the damned, evil spirits, and God’s wrath.
Such horrifyingly prophetic radio transmissions seem to serve as a Greek chorus, but their actual meaning in relation to the action of the film (which it often is not) is rather questionable. Like this voiceover narration, it is useless but is accompanied by even more artsie-farts self-conceit.
This is what comes out after months of filming, why does every single shot look identical to the last? the atmosphere was enveloped in boredom. Never was the audience’s heart beating or palms sweaty, it was utterly unbearable to sit through the rest of this boring production.
The movie was intended to be an addictive action film but instead ended up a lazy and reckless attempt at a thriller horror film. To the audiences despair, Movin’ Too Fast is so poorly made on virtually every level that it doesn’t even work for parody.
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