Blood Lake: Attack of the Killer Lampreys
What comes to mind might be Blood Lake and its exceptional depiction of annual family vacations. Undoubtedly, the obvious one is the Joe Dante’s Piranha; the inclusion of crybaby tourists who turn into food for the fish monsters is a strong theme in both works. Here, the role of the toothy anus is taken over by lampreys that are, best described within the film, as a swarm of angry idiots.
As in Joe Dante’s monster movie Maggie, Brooks’ Michael is a man who possesses no sense of humor and is mildly interested in saving the world as Michael, a character in the film. But being a lamprey expert, he is stunned by their baffling attempts at violence and it becomes a race against time to prevent their infiltration of the Mississippi.
As far as the characters are concerned, that’s standard Middle Americana, a cookie-cut community with Michael relocating his family to the suburb Michigander. As it often is with bad movies, getting from one gruesome head to the next is the point of the plot and the special effects are deliciously excessive. I mean, who doesn’t get a kick out of dismembering lampreys with a grass trimmer?
Shooting digitally for an ultra sleek appearance, director James Cullen Bressack makes the most of a stretched budget, although the outrageous standard of the CGI will have you in stitches. The use of half decent practical effects make one wish it’d been done the whole hog and made a latex throwback instead. Even more strange is the fact of Christopher Lloyd growling his way through the lines of Mr. Akerman, mayor of the town.
With the lake aspect however, bikini bods, male muscle and the jocks’ brawny image, and pretty boys emerge though never in as much as it’s eighties predecessors. It is a passionate salute to the creature feature, but one that gazes more towards the now than yester years. As far as made for tv movies go, you would be hard pushed to find one half us that much fun.
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