Viking: The Berserkers
How is it going to go? A bird does not have any raven. In the first stage where a young man’s heart is cut out and the camera is on it, the action cuts to a close shot of a window. Probably, the producers ran out of money for a raven, or they were sure we would not see the difference. Regrettably, this one does not bode well for the movie.
It is 835AD. An extremist Viking faction known as the Berserkers has landed on the shores of Saxon England, and they mean to kill, burn, and steal whatever is on their way, and may even add some sack, socks, or till, whatever that means to them. Some Saxons are taken as prisoners of war, and they enact a breath taking man hunt to impress Odin, or something of the sort. It’s a chase flick, with the Saxons trying to escape their pursuers who happen to be blood thirsty Vikings.
Lots of whacking, little nay dialogue, lots of drug abuse among Vikings to get them in a frenzy, just like Samuel Ødman suggested, berserkers used to become on account of Siberian shamans. Unfortunately, there is no evidence that this ever took place, but, oh yes, this work should not be critiqued regarding its historical accuracy. I might keep telling about this, and it will definitely start becoming boring.
Vikings: The Berserkers is referred to as the ‘Viking Catching Fire’ and it should be viewed as a fantasy film diaphanously draped in Vikingness. The plot is about the Berserkers and their five victims, two women and three men. Following the mass capture of Saxon soldiers, five Saxonians are selected for the ritual hunt. They are to have their hearts torn out and offered to a völva, an artist of astonishing proportions as far as the use of cosmetics is concerned.
When I saw this person, I thought more about Mad Max than Scandinavia in the Dark Age. During the ritual hunt, the Berserkers are also painted in white faced make-up. They are rabid, draped in animal hides and are savage. If I may be frank, they seem more akin to Celtic Frost rather than real Vikings but let’s put that aside for the time being.
In contrast to the vikings, the depiction of Saxon characters in the movie is multidimensional. There’s a coward male, a neurotic female, an obnoxious yet heroic monk, a male under-age whose character arc protrudes out during the whole film, a beautiful semi-anger female and a cage full of kids. You can guess which ones get oscar and which only get the corpse scene.
I suppose that sufficiently describes the environment. So, how was the movie? For me, the characters were all rather disengaging. I did not root for either the Saxons or the Vikings. It felt like something was really missing. Maybe I simply do not have the capability of rooting for characters in a film of this nature because I have viewed too many of them.
The actors were fine, I suppose. The script was decent with a few gaps of logic where it was not explained how characters knew some things, such as the fact that if they completely smeared their faces with blood, the Vikings with all their noses could no longer trace them. The best aspects of the movie were probably the best aspects of the movie the cinematography and the beautiful locations where the film was shot although there were a few bizarre shots with uncomfortable ‘blooms’ in lighting. I hope those were not imperfections of my DVD.
It was amusing when the children in the cage took the mushrooms and turned berserkers themselves. Did the berserkers who roared onto the set give them some sort of therapy for biting off Viking necks? I did not find any psychological scars or side effects that would cause trauma that made me want to chuckle a little. Overall, this movie did not evoke any kind of profound feelings or emotions in me. It was average, I would say, rather bland.
It is not as bad as most of the other movies I reviewed on here but still wasn’t good enough for me to think about watching it again. I can understand how it would work for some, and it could indeed be the center of attraction in a student Viking movie night with popcorn, beer and other friends to watch it with but it is definitely not one for a solitary viewer or a couple for a quiet movie night.
In the British Dark ages, a bunch of young Saxons is seized by one of the Viking tribes and hunted down in a blood thirsty sport for ‘the winner’.
While some describe it as a Medieval “Hunger Games,” don’t expect a Katniss Everdeen-like heroine and a brilliant plot where the wailing and grunting which permeates most of the film doesn’t serve as the plot itself. “T Viking: The Berserkers” is not even the I’ll watch ‘Sharnado,’ or ‘Piranhaconda’ with the stupid song, ‘Viking: The Berserkers’ is one of those movies that is just plain bad. From the garments worn to the fake teeth used and the low-browed totally unnecessary grunting that was prevalent among the Viking warriors, it cannot be redeemed from what might have been a promising concept.
Viking warriors who pillaged a weak village take a few of the villagers captive and prepare them for a ‘game,’ the hunters being the captives themselves. It is the task of Viking warriors to find the captives and decimate their hearts to cut down five of them for a ceremony, which is overseen by odd priestess called The Volva (Kezia Burrows) who has set her sights on one of the captives, Wade (Sol Heras), the golden child of the group who recently witnessed his father being killed by her warriors. He is the hero, but apart from being a fuck head, possessed by fear, or spouse to someone who is physically useless like the rest of captives, there is nothing heroic about him.
This happens after the captives are freed and transferred into the treelined they take some kind of herb that encourages them to foam around the mouth and shake, and then, as if high on Viking meth, the dramatics. From this point onward it is relentless grunts and screams as the weakness and evil first go down the wall.
When the Vikings have a bling on their scalps, those who do not like the look of it then Isaac and Alden (Amber Jean Rowan) get the hint and later come in after some fighting back. Soon after they all go back to one of the main camps and then Asher geysers bound maps herb in peoples faces and things go to shit. You then begin to wonder, who exactly are the captives in the end as they watch themselves being taken captives marked “What the fuck did I just watch?”.
It’s the kind of movie that in a different era you would have spotted in a rack in an old Blockbuster or Hollywood Video just because the artwork on the cover was fascinating or the description of it on the back was appealing but within the first five minutes, you already know that you messed up. And that pretty much leaves no room to turn back as it all really boils down to either your time or the three ninety-nine dollars you previously dropped.
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